Bitches

May 4, 2009

This weekend the Bub and I got snubbed at the playground. I was chasing a ball while playing “soccer-basketball-slide down the slide” and I ran past some other mommies. I said “Hi” but I just got the snotty nod.
Now these mommies were young, and skinny, and dressed in maxi sundresses with beaded wedge sandals. They had on makeup. I, however, had on paint stained jeans and a spongebob squarepants t-shirt. And I am neither young nor skinny nor made-up.
When I was pregnant, I really, truly thought I would be one of those mommies. And that I would have a little girl in pink sandals with painted toe nails. When I found out I was having a boy, well, that was OK. He would be cool, in Ramones onesies and teeny Chucks. And we would be clean–no Kool Aid mustaches on my kid!
But the reality is, is that I am a mom of a boy. A boy who could care less about the Ramones (other than the obvious pleasure of dancing to Sheena is a Punk Rocker) and would much rather wear his stained and worn Thomas the Tank shirt. And forget the teeny Chucks. They are expensive, and fall apart, and have LACES not velcro so hell no.
And I am a mommy who is ass-deep in the sand box. I’m just as stained as my kid. We probably both have juice mustaches, because I obviously am eating the juice and cookies at snacktime!
I’m still jealous of the thin, pretty mommies, but I know I’m having more fun! Plus, I saw their husbands, and let me tell you, mine is much, much cuter than their Gone to Seed McHigh School Hero and Baldy McAccountant! But they could have at least said “hi” back.0307091547

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2 Responses to “Bitches”


  1. girl, i feel you. i miss my little man being that little. may you rule the sandbox forever! kel.

  2. Ashley Says:

    Amy, I am a Mom of a girl and just as stained as you. And I’m sure you are way hotter and cooler than those mommies.


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